#BitterSweet

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Today's my second to the last Friday here in this office. In this greyish white office table I have sat on for 2 years and 8 months of my career in EsEm. All this messy clutter, chaotic stacks of papers, pens, and even candy wrapper, I always thought that I was leaving this place soon. But neither did I expect that SOON will be five working days from now.

The Fallen

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Last Friday (August 1,) I found out that another colleague in college died on Wednesday. At first, I could not believe it. I did not want to believe it. For one thing, the sources were not too "reliable" in my opinion, and besides, there were no news about it in Facebook whatsoever. I immediately went to the guy's wall. No condolences to the family, no recent posts still. It seems that nobody seems to want to "talk" about it. Only a select few knew... and what's sad is, I really did not believe it until I personally asked one of his closest friends, and she confirmed it.

The Best Decision I've Made In My Life (So far)

"Incompetent. Unproductive. Inefficient."

Words can be harsh, gut-wrenching, ego-demeaning- especially when those words come from the person with the highest position in the company you've been working for two years and six months. Those two years and six months of working very long hours a day than required (9.5 hours a day is already long, btw.) I am not a perfect employee, I know that. I may have lapses here and there, I may have spent some company time doing personal stuff (like right now, with this blog)...but who hasn't? But more importantly, I try my best to make up for my inadequacies. I work my ass off to come up with a decent output, to try to meet their expectations...to move heaven and earth when the job calls for it.