#BitterSweet

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Today's my second to the last Friday here in this office. In this greyish white office table I have sat on for 2 years and 8 months of my career in EsEm. All this messy clutter, chaotic stacks of papers, pens, and even candy wrapper, I always thought that I was leaving this place soon. But neither did I expect that SOON will be five working days from now.

It is bitter-sweet indeed. It will take a little time to adjust again. To not breathe the same stale cold air, to not have lunch and dinner with the same people I've been sharing a table with for all of my stay here. I guess that's what I will miss the most... the friends I've gained, tested thru time and a series of unfortunate events. The bosses? Well, they could just suck each other dry for all I care. I've lost some, if not, all respect for them. I know, I know. I am still bitter about the whole thing, but who would not be?

The uncertainty of what my life will be after I step out of this 11-floor concrete office is quite daunting. It's as if I'm trekking into the unknown, with only my aching pride and ego intact.

I don't want to regret my decision. If there's one thing I can only be truly be proud of myself is my "paninindigan." Call it pride or whatever, at least I can to myself that I did not buckle, I did not let them trample on me just like they did to the people who went ahead first. No way. Even though I agreed to extend for two weeks more, I still have the last laugh. I still have the last hurrah.

Or so I thought.

I hate to admit it. But I will miss the independence. The carefree decision I can make for myself without disobeying or insulting anyone. I love my freedom, but I love my family more.