To Fold or Not to Fold?

I started playing poker about five years ago... nothing fancy nor putting a hole in my pockets that sort of sh*t- just fun, friendly games with my cousins, brother-in-law and sometimes guy friends/ barkada. We play it at the beach, at the porch of our house. I remember we had a poker night birthday celebration because my 25th birthday fell (as it usually does) on a holy week. To be honest, that's the only card game that I can confidently say I have a knack at, and the funny thing is, I only learned to play poker on Facebook. Yep, during those apprenticeship days in my former office's computer and fast internet connection. It was downright addictive, and some of my bosses, were also into it. It was about time that my Mom bought a poker game set, complete with colorful poker chips that came with a neat metallic silver case.

Reflections

In a corporate jungle such as this place I'm in, it's easy to get lost in the piles of papers on our desks, long lines of To-do lists, beating of unrealistic deadlines, phone calls, emails, meetings, and just basically, work that never seem to end even if we spend more than 10 hours of our waking hours in a day. The sad part is, money is still not enough to sustain a decent lifestyle, let alone pay the monthly rent and bills. Then like lightning striking unexpectedly in a hot day, it got me thinking.... is this all worth it?

Status: It's Complicated

Just when I thought of giving up... of finally letting go of a fantasy that's been brewing in my mind for the past months...for letting go of what could or might have beens... for not letting myself be truly happy with that person... slowly trying to accept that things may not just be meant to be.... but then, I see an orange propped on my office table this morning.

And as if an automatic reset button has been pressed, the cycle begins all over again....

Rantings

I hate being sick... especially when I'm here in Manila- all alone, I need to fend for myself, force myself to stand up to cook or buy medicine, and mostly, Mommie is not here to take care of me. :(

Difficult times like these make me really think of packing up and going home for good. Come to think of it, I have been thinking about going home a lot lately. With the crisis and all, it made me realize what matters to me the most, and that is being with my family. I miss them so much everyday. I try to make it through the day though, because sulking and moping around won't get me anywhere.

My City is Crumbling

Photo Credits: https://www.facebook.com/ZamboNewsUpdate

Day 13.

It has been twelve days since this nightmare began. Even though I am in Manila, 1,102 kilometers away from the sporadic firing and the occasional bombings, I can still feel the pain, loss, panic, weariness from all this poorly written script of some insane person's mind. I can taste the unimaginable fear of my people in my mouth- putrid, like puffing an expired cigarette. My heart skips whenever I see posts in my face book wall of gunshots, house fires, airstrikes, and mortars dropping anywhere like the ones handling them are just throwing them in the air aimlessly (or purposely? who really knows.)

A Dark September

Yesterday, September 9, 2012, was probably one of the darkest days in my hometown, Zamboanga City. There were gunshots, a series of bombings, rocket propelled grenades (RPGs), hostage takings, human shields, mass evacuations from affected barangays. All seem like a nightmare, and the scary part is, it is still ongoing as of this writing.

I woke up at around 7:30 a.m. Running late for work, I instinctively searched for my cellphone that's been covered by the multitude of pillows in my bed. I saw a message from Mommie:

"Zambo City is under siege from armed elements said to be elements of  Misuari's MNLF. City Mayor declared no work and classes." Received 09/09/13 7:04 am